


Neural Connections

by AR_Stone



Category: Pacific Rim (Movies), The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Pacific Rim Fusion, F/F, F/M, Post-Movie: Pacific Rim (2013), Slow Burn Clarke Griffin/Lexa
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-08
Updated: 2020-08-20
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:41:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25778341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AR_Stone/pseuds/AR_Stone
Summary: Normally, cadets were only brought to the main compound when they were paired, and ready for the nightblood. Clarke was an exception.It was clear, now, that she was going to require a different kind of training, if she were going to be able to pilot a Jaeger. It was not something Lexa was looking forward to, if she were honest. Of course, there were various tests to be done as to why Clarke wasn’t able to connect with anyone. Or more accurately, why her connections were too strong, too unstable, in order to be successful.Or: I've decided that the Pacific Rim Universe would go great with The 100 themes, characters, and story line. Of course, Clarke and Lexa are endgame, and it takes time to get there.
Relationships: Clarke Griffin/Lexa
Comments: 13
Kudos: 71





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello,
> 
> If you're here, thanks for jumping into what may or may not be a half decent mash up of the Pacific Rim universe and the 100.
> 
> First work for me ever, had an idea and went with it. Helpful commentary is welcome, hateful is not.
> 
> Cheers!
> 
> And Ps: Because I'm spit-balling here, I'm sure some of the science references in here are not accurate, just go with it if you can

Just when one conflict ends, another arises. She sighs, not for the first time, wondering when the hell she’ll get some sleep. 

The new arrivals had just been registered and taken to their quarters in the main compound of the Jaeger Defense Program. There were seven new cadets in total, all of whom had never been on the ground up until 4 and a half months ago.

While that had its own issues, what was more bothersome for the Commander was how unusually fast their training had progressed. No one had seen connections in the neural bridge as strong as those of the sky kids. Even stranger, it seemed they were unable to co-pilot with anyone outside their group. In other words, these seven outsiders were extremely gifted, and none of them would be able to link up with the hundreds of pilots that actually knew the terrain.

Lexa definitely had her work cut out for her, needing these super teams to be ready to use such a rare talent, and soon.

The good news of all of it was the three strong neural connections that came from the new cadets. The pairings, Bellamy and Atom, Octavia and Raven, Jasper and Monty, were all strong, and they wouldn’t need the nightblood to be completely cohesive. 

And then there was the seventh pilot. The odd number of strangers left Clarke, unpaired, and incompatible with every other pilot she has trained with, or tried to, for the last 3 and half months. 

Normally, cadets were only brought to the main compound when they were paired, and ready for the nightblood. Clarke was an exception.

It was clear, now, that she was going to require a different kind of training, if she were going to be able to pilot a Jaeger. It was not something Lexa was looking forward to, if she were honest. Of course, there were various tests to be done as to why Clarke wasn’t able to connect with anyone. Or more accurately, why her connections were too strong, too unstable, in order to be successful. 

Lexa had a sinking suspicion that she was going to have to lend herself to said testing, as she was the only pilot at the base that was unpaired, and had already been given nightblood. If Clarke, and her friends, pathways were too strong for those without the neural enhancement, then it was a possibility that they needed to be with someone who did have the nightblood.

It was painful for Lexa, knowing she might have to back in the con-pod with someone else.

Lexa was the Commander of the Jaeger Defense Program, but she hadn’t always held that title. She was a ranger, and pilot, first. She had never intended to succeed pilot status, taking charge of the program was the only way to distract herself from completely falling apart after the accident. After Costia.

2 years of training, 3 being co-pilots, gone. Costia and Lexa had the strongest neural bridge the program had seen in decades. It was not known if they’d see another as strong for quite some time. Over the last six years, old breach points had been detecting activity, of what kind they don’t know. Costia and Lexa were the most skilled Jaeger pilots, and they were sent out on recon of the strongest active breach.

They did not expect it to be as dangerous as it was, and Costia did not come back alive.

Lexa had now been Commander for 3 years, buying time, it seemed, until the Kaiju finally forced their way back through the breaches. 

The Original Kaiju war had ended 58 years ago, however they were not so lucky to have found peace. The breaches that these monsters had come through were forcibly closed, but it was not a permanent solution. 

The Jaeger Defense Program had been created 63 years ago, in 2014, after humanity’s wildest fears were realized. There were other life forms in the universe, no, they were not friendly, and no, they didn’t speak English, or Spanish, or German, or any other language other than, quite frankly, hideously annoying screeches. 

No, if they wanted to communicate, it would require connecting the brains of these building-sized, slime-covered terrors to neural sensors. In order to do that, you had to kill one first. Given that these creatures could snatch planes out of the air with little to no effort, and sink the biggest war ships with a well aimed slap of the ocean, the old ways of war would not be sufficient. 

Nuclear weapons were an option, however it wouldn’t just be the Kaiju that suffered the effects of that weapon. A new method had to be created. 

Enter, Jaegers: larger than life, stories high, enormous robots. Walking machines of destruction, built at such a scale, the human race could stand a fighting chance against the creatures that crawled out of Hades's hell hole. Or maybe they were Satan’s pets, the depths that they came from clearly burned of misery in one way or the other.

These machines, the Jaegers, were the most powerful combination of machinery and modern technology, having been created to interact with the human neural interface. The idea was to enable these robots to move as fluidly as soldiers would, and the only way to successfully do that, was to connect them to the mind. It allowed the Jaegers to be far more effective than simple AI controls.

The problem with said technology was that it took such a toll on the human body, they couldn’t be operated alone. Jaegers required two, sometimes (rarely) three, people to control them. Thus, the Jaeger Defense Program, and it’s numerous training sites, were created. The more the Jaegers were used, and upgraded, the more co-pilots they would need. 

Co-pilots, for obvious reasons, had to be compatible in order for the neural bridge to hold, without a strong enough connection, the Jaegers would not perform at the level they were created. Further, it could be damaging to have such a poor connection to the people operating the Jaegers, as they were quite literally operating as one mind.

Of course, there were safety supports in place to minimize the dangers of being a Jaeger pilot, like special suits that allowed them to interact with the interface of the machine inside the Conn Pod. That was dangerous enough on its own, as it was located in the chest of the robot, hundreds of feet above the ground, and destructive blows to the Jaeger could just as easily kill the pilots inside.

Because of this, many lives were lost, and even as the Kaiju were momentarily defeated, the pilot program had suffered heavy losses, and it was not easy finding partners with a high enough compatibility to handle the stress of operating such large machines together.

That’s where nightblood came in to play. Seven years after the Kaiju breaches were blocked, in 2026, scientists tasked with studying the human brain created a serum that allowed two co-pilots to fully operate under one mind, while in their Jaegers. Essentially, they created an AI designed to safely live in the human body. The nightblood was only advantageous when the pilots were in their Jaegers, the AI was only there to help the pathways in one brain, connect to the pathways in another.

That was why it was incredibly unusual to co-pilot with more than one person. The nightblood was only given to a pairing that had been training together long enough to build a strong bond on their own, using the nightblood to enhance it. It also made the pilots more connected to each other than anyone else in the world, and having to pilot with someone different was just too hard.

All of this Lexa knew. She’d been in the program for so long she could tell you the ins and outs of Jaegers and Kaijus in her sleep. She knew, co-piloting with a stranger, even for a short time, would not be a pleasant experience, and more than likely drag up deeply painful memories she had done well in burying.

It was not impossible to make a new connection, just extremely difficult, and that’s when one was willing to do it. She wasn’t. She didn’t plan on changing that anytime soon.

So, when Lexa finally did meet the seven strangers from the sky, and, more specifically, Clarke, it was the most captivated she had been by one person in quite some time. It caught her off guard, how radiant and intelligent Clarke was. She hardly knew anything about her, and yet she could see something in her that was unmistakable. Unique, special, she wasn’t sure how to describe it, just a quality that demanded her curiosity.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few more characters are brought in, and I've turned Wells into a grounder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the warm response to my first chapter! It made me more excited to get Clarke's POV out there today. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy it! 
> 
> Cheers ~

“If we do not work together, if we can not put our differences aside, this war will be over before you can finish your insults. Is that Clear?”

“Yes Ma’am!”

Her friends had only been in this class for three days and already Clarke could tell Anya was less than thrilled to be tasked with training the sky kids.

It was scary in a new way, Anya didn’t have to raise her voice, not really. It was an unnerving quite demand, and it had the required effect, Monty and Atom stopped snipping at each other, finally. Anya was going over what happens in the drift, as they’ve been grilled about since the Jaeger Program found them, on what Clarke had assumed to be a beach.

Anya continued her teachings, still staring, completely apathetic to the arguments she just silenced.

“Next time, if you idiots want to be childish morons, save it for when I don’t have to hear it.” Again, spoken in that deadly calm voice. “The drift, as you should know by now, is the hardest part of being a pilot. It’s imperative that you stay focused, without latching on to anything you see during the handshake. Jaegers connect the left hemisphere of one pilot’s brain with the right hemisphere of another, thus you each control one side. That’s how we are able to control it in the first place, and effectively.” Anya spared no time for questions; she was completely dialed in to explaining the logistics of the drift.

“If you don’t let your memories flow, and allow the neural handshake to properly connect your brain to your co-pilot’s, the drift won’t be successful.” It was actually impressive how serious, yet bored Anya sounded as she drilled this into the seven soldiers.

Clarke and Raven exchanged unimpressed glances, as they’ve been grilled and hit over the head with the same information for months. Literally, since these people found them, they’ve hardly spoken about much else.

Apparently, separate from the fact that they were born in space and were consequently discarded from the ark like unclaimed baggage, Clarke’s group had unusually strong neural pathways, and their connections with each other were already as strong as the ones approved for the power up drug, or nightblood, whatever you wanted to call it.  
Unfortunately for Clarke, she was the odd one out, with no partner of her own, and every attempt at pairing with someone from the ground had gone pretty terrible.

  
“So here’s a wild question, who’s Clarke going to pair with? All of her connections have blown up, literally, in her face. No offense, Clarke,” Jasper really didn’t sound all that apologetic, the mischief in his eyes and grin on his face clearly proving otherwise.

“Jasper shut up, we’ve all seen the traumatized nose bleeds Clarke’s big head has been causing, no need to rub salt in the wound.” Now Raven had jumped in, laughing at Clarke’s expense. None of it was malicious, they’d all grown up together, this was how they messed around.

Obviously it was not the right time, as Anya could’ve lit them all on fire with the intensity of her stare, completely disgusted by the display happening in front of her.  
“What did I say about conversing like idiots!?” And now, Anya was yelling. Good to know she does, in fact, loose her patience, and was therefore actually human.

“Anya, take a break. Indra, take the paired cadets to the drift sim room, run them through the handshake twice, each,” Commander Lexa handed out the orders, her tone oozed authority, her face betraying nothing of whether she’d heard the commotion going on a few seconds ago.

“Clarke, you’ll be training with me today.” Again, the tone clearly meant no arguing with the Commander’s decision.

Excellent, Clarke gets to learn from the most proficient Jaeger pilot the program had seen in decades. And yes, that is sarcastic. Normally, having the chance to be personally taught by someone of Lexa’s caliber would be exciting. However, Lexa was not known for her gentle touch, or even intense yelling, which could still be interesting.

No, the Commander of all 12 Jaeger compounds was uniquely stoic, seemingly void of emotion. Which, Clarke knew from her psychology studies on the Ark, was probably not the truth. However, if the last few months had taught Clarke anything, it was how powerful drifting with another person could be, when it was strong, and especially when it had been enhanced by the nightblood.

Not much of the Commander was known beyond her accolades in the program, and her success as a Jaeger pilot. Unfortunately, that also meant it was common knowledge that Lexa was the only nightblood enhanced pilot without a partner, and why. The name of said pilot, was Costia. Being part of such a successful Jaeger team meant she was honored by the program in every compound when the Kaiju took her life.

What was surprising for Clarke, was what she had heard about Lexa, and how she’d barely taken any time to rest, before moving into a lead role outside of the Conn Pod.  
The bottom line? Clarke had no idea what was in store for her. She didn’t mind a bit of mystery, it kept her on her toes, but in a good way. Not this. It quite honestly scared the hell out of her, how in the world could she possibly live up to any expectations or standards this girl held? Clarke was sure they were close in age, so it seemed, and yet Lexa had done more in 8 years than Clarke was planning on doing in her lifetime.

She was also afraid, because none of her connections had worked, but more than that, she hadn’t really had anyone in her mind. From what Raven and Octavia had told her, they each stepped into the memories together. Not to live them again, they couldn’t do that, but even letting them flow, the sight, sound, smell of it. The emotions, all sensations you felt in that moment, that memory, your co-pilot would feel as if those memories belonged to them, too.

It’s not that she had deep dark secrets that needed to be guarded.

Clarke didn’t want anything in her head being felt by another person, good or bad. The amount of trust required just to tell someone else about what rattled around in her skull was hard enough.

She stayed strong for her friends, time and time again, when shit hit the fan. Like, say, being dropped out of the sky by her own mother, for reasons only the council knew. Her friends didn’t even know why they were sent off with Clarke on the worst experience of their lives.

There was no need to add insult to injury. However, if someone got in her head, there would be no doubt they would know about Clarke’s mistake. Her father’s discovery. Her father, who, if Clarke had just listened to him, might’ve been spared being vacuumed into the freezing depths of space, floating around like the human equivalent of an ice pop.

The last thing Clarke wanted, was for someone else to know that her actions had led to her father’s execution. It was hard enough having her mother be the one to sentence him, then turn around and look Clarke in the eyes as she told her that Jake would die for Clarke’s stupidity.

So, no, not multiple, deep dark secrets, anyway. Maybe, just one.

“Clarke? Let’s go, we’ve work to do,” and Clarke heard the impatience, subtle as it was, in Lexa’s command.

“Yes, Commander,” Clarke sighed quietly, let’s get on with it, whatever “it” was.

~

As it turned out, Clarke wouldn’t be touching the drift simulator until the Jaeger’s scientists and medical team gathered as much information about her brain function as they could. How did the Commander put it?

“I will not waste time repeating past errors without new information. It’s better we know what we are dealing with, rather than take a shot in the dark, again.” That particular comment seemed to be aimed at Ranger Wells, who was responsible for Clarke’s training before coming here.

Which was fine with her, the drift, obviously less taxing on her than her previous candidates, was still a taxing experience.

Wells and another researcher, Nyko was his name, were discussing the results of Clarke’s bloodwork, MRI, and PET scans.

“The MRI can show us the structures of your brain, we can compare it to a normal, or grounder, as you say, brain to see any differences that exist. The PET scan will show us how your brain is actually working,” Wells soothed at Clarke’s raised eyebrows. The Ark had plenty of technology, however the large looking donut in the corner of the medical room hadn’t appeared at all enticing.

And so, Clarke sat on the examination table, waiting for the images to be explained. Clarke’s mother had been teaching her about medicine for a few years now, however all of their scanners had malfunctioned a while back, meaning Clarke didn’t have much experience, any actually, reading them.

Clarke was never able to hold her tongue for long, her patience not a strong suit, “Commander, what will my training even look like? If my neural handshakes are not going to be successful, I don’t see how I’ll be useful here,” her question only projecting her curiosity, she was careful not to speak in a way that would be received as disrespectful.

The Commander regarded her with a blank look, and a raised hand, signaling her to wait. Well, okay then, no questions.

“Nyko, what do you see?” Lexa asked, glancing at Clarke as she did.

“Her pathways are so much quicker than usual; I haven’t seen anyone with a neural capacity like this without the influence of nightblood. Your suspicions were correct, Commander, Clarke, and likely her friends, pathways are too strong to drift with pilots without the upgrade,” Nyko hesistated, clearly debating his next words, “I’m not sure if Clarke will be able to drift with someone even with the nightblood. Have we tried drifting her with someone else from the sky?”

“Nyko, you know as well as I do that strong connections in the neural handshake, especially ones like theirs, is difficult, and even painful to pair with a different mind.” Lexa’s tone gave nothing away, simply stating the facts, although, and Clarke might be seeing things, she could’ve sworn those vibrant green eyes hardened slightly.

And striking eyes they were, seeming to take on different shades, Clarke had noticed. She shouldn’t have, but it wasn’t something she consciously knew she was doing. She found her own observations uncomfortable, quickly averting her eyes away from the Commander.

“We only suggest it as they’re normal brain waves are so much quicker, stronger, than ours, they might be better equipped to drift with another person. Our other options are to start testing her against nightblood, Commander.” Wells interrupted Clarke’s thoughts with his giddiness, despite the Commander’s still stoic appearance.  
“If you could mind your place, Wells, this is my med bay, you had your chance, remember?” Nyko nudged Wells as he joked, the both of them laughing with ease. If it bothered Lexa, she didn’t show it, merely nodding her head along with Well’s answer.

“We do not have un-paired nightbloods to pair her with. If her pathways are that strong, could we test her in the drift by herself?” Lexa seemed to be pondering her ideas out loud, the light tone and tilt of her head making her look more invested than she’d appeared all afternoon.

Clarke could swear Wells and Nyko both lit up in excitement, and a bit of trepidation, at the idea.

“If we carefully monitor Clarke while she drifts with a modified, single-pilot simulator, it’s possible to test the theory, Commander. It should be noted, however, that even pilots with nightblood have never tried piloting Jaegers alone. We have no idea what the stress will do, even to her,” even with the concern in his voice, Nyko was still glowing at what these tests could yield.

“Modify the sim, we’re testing her alone at 13:00 tomorrow,” and with that, Lexa nodded at the three of them, and left the room.

“Well shit, sure I think that’s a great idea, you have my permission to play 20 questions with my brain, let’s hope I last long enough to get to #3,” Clarke deadpanned. They may be excited, but they didn’t sound confident.

“Oh, you big baby, you’ll be fine! Besides, you made more noses bleed in the time you’ve been here than I thought was humanly possible. If you pass out, I don’t think it will be the worst thing in the world,” Wells certainly thought he was funny, shoving Clarkes shoulder and laughing at her.

Wells was technically her superior, he was the one in charge of trying to train her all those months ago, however he was really more of a friend than anything else. “I don’t get any sympathy from the ice gallery over there?” Clarke sounded pissed, but her expression showed she was only playing.

“Ice gallery, what the hell does that mean?” Wells looked at Clarke with a very confused look. “It’s an Ark thing,” Clarke’s references and metaphors sometimes didn’t make any sense to the people on the ground. They hadn’t lived in the Ark, they wouldn’t know what she meant, whoops.

“Enough of that, both of you, go back to your quarters, you’re disturbing my work!” Nyko was shooing both Clarke and Wells through the med bay doors, quite roughly, she might add.

She and Wells did as they were told, and headed back to living sector of the compound. Clarke’s quarters were shared among her sky family that had fallen with her to the ground. It was essentially just a large room, a metal box, if you will, with 3 sets of bunk beds lined up on the left and right sides of the room. As sad as that might sound, the mattresses and pillows they were given were surprisingly luxurious. The grey metal walls that exuding a cold, lonely aura, were familiar to Clarke’s group. With the exception of a few scattered windows, the sky bunk, as they’d taken to calling it, felt comforting in all the chaos that they had dropped into.

Further on down the hall, was Wells’ living space. He, unlike Clarke, had a room to himself, only because he was a ranger, and not a cadet in training. The Ranger rooms were not too different from the sky bunk, they smaller metal boxes, really, however they had the better views, getting to look out at the ocean. The best advantage was the bed, however, which was much bigger than the bunks. Even as the room wasn’t great in size, hardly anyone had time to do anything other than sleep when in their quarters anyway.

Wells had spent a good part of their walk looking at Clark, making this weird smug, maybe satisfied, face, if Clarke could even call it that. He was directing such weird looks her way, yet not saying anything. It was irritating. “What, Wells?” Clarke bit out her words more aggressively than she had intended.

“Calm down, I’m just enjoying the fact that you are now the Commander’s problem. My training skills were called into question by your uniquely big head, seems only fair she gets stuck with your stubborn ass!” he wasn’t even offended at Clarke’s tone, or glare, just completely satisfied about the situation, it seemed.

“Even better, you have the pleasure of working with someone else as stubborn as you are. Not that I would ever admit to calling our Commander as such, to her face.” Wells gave her a pointed look as he finished, which Clarke took as not to repeat that particular comment.

“Yeah! Well –”

“CLARKE! Get over here, Monty thinks he can best Bellamy in hand to hand combat!” Raven and Octavia were squeezing through the door frame to their sleeping quarters, both having tried to grab for Clarke at the same time. It was a sight to see, a ridiculous one at that.

“Talk later, Wells! I need to corral my friends before they do something stupid, it seems. Or join them, depending on what we get up to!” Clarke waved him off, turning to join the commotion happening back in her bunk.

Along with their Jaeger education and drift training, the sky teens were immediately thrust into combat training as soon as they’d had what was deemed a sufficient amount of recovery from the drop from space. That turned out to be about one day. Needless to say, the first month or so of being on the ground consisted of daily gripes about how unbelievably sore everyone was, and many motivational sentiments were needed to actually get up each day.

It was worth it in the end, because after they all adjusted to their knew routine, it was actually fun, feeling a little powerful, and on their own, play fighting with each other. It never occurred to any of them that that would’ve been their chosen extracurricular when time allowed for it.

Walking back into their bunk with Octavia and Raven, Monty was actually holding his own against Bellamy. “C’mon Monty, watch for his tells, evade hits you can’t take!” Jasper was red in the face cheering on his best friend. “WOOO!! Kick his ass, to the mat B!” and then there was Atom, a bit more crass in his encouragement, but supportive nonetheless.

Clarke and Octavia stood off to the left of the fight, while Raven chose help Jasper coach Monty to victory. Clarke could already tell that Octavia had questions, her set jaw and sudden focus giving her away, “So, what’s the deal? Who’s going to pilot with you? What’s she like, the Commander?”

“I was thinking you’d start off with a ‘hey, Clarke, we missed you for the three hours you were gone’ but I suppose a multitude of inquiries will suffice.” Octavia laughed at that, smirked, and just shrugged at her, still waiting for answers. “No training for me today, apparently they’ve grown tired of dealing with the aftermath of my failed drifts. Today they rain tests to see why that was, nothing invasive! Relax. Also, no one is piloting with me until some theories about our weirdly fast brainwaves are tested.” It’s been quite the day, but trying to explain it all to Octavia wasn’t the most enticing idea at the moment. There’s no way any of her friends would like the idea of Clarke trying to drift alone, they’d all been taught how dangerous that could be.

“Damn Griff, well aren’t you special. Or we, I should say, same genes, sort of. And, we did miss your bossy presence, as always,” heavy on the sarcasm, Clarke laughed as that could be true at times, “What about the Commander, you didn’t say anything about her yet?” Curious as ever.

“The Commander is incredibly collected, almost unnervingly so. She exudes poise and control, more than I’ve ever seen.” Octavia scowled at her answer, most likely hoping for a little more than that, “Clarke that’s what everyone says about her”

“Exactly, now I know why, she doesn’t let on much more than what we already know.” Clarke thought it was impressive, actually, how well she schooled her expressions, lack thereof, and body language, to the point that it almost wasn’t possible to read her at all.

Octavia walked over to cheer on Bellamy after that, seeing as Monty had just kicked both legs out from under him, clearly catching Bell by surprise. It made Clarke smile, being able to still have fun in the whirlwind that was now, and maybe always had been, their life.

Clarke found herself lost in thoughts of the Commander. She couldn’t discern whether she was more intrigued by her, or perhaps admired her, but something about Lexa drew her focus away from the present without much struggle. She didn’t want to think of Lexa in the way she caught herself doing today, noticing how deep and beautiful her eyes are. The green of them reminded Clarke of her imaginations of grass and forests while she was still on the Ark. The way they changed so suddenly, expressive as they were, even in color, mesmerized her. It didn’t escape Clarke that Lexa’s eyes were not the only thing about her that was captivating. If anything, the little she did know, and could observe, only drew her in more. It was a strange feeling, and one that would likely go unresolved.

Lexa was the commander, not her friend. More than that, she seemed far more interested in the enigma that was Clarke’s drift ability, and that of her friends, than who any of them were. She understood it, however, this was war, or the anticipation of war, and Clarke would do well to keep that in mind. She already had her friends, and she didn’t need to add Lexa to that list.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The plot thickens, very slightly

Damn, Clarke would love to be the one on the mat, twisting Jasper’s arm like it’s a balloon animal, and a poor one at that. But no, seeing as the Commander wanted to test Clarke solo in the drift, Nyko had informed Lincoln, today’s combat trainer, that Clarke was not allowed to participate further than the basics today. So, she spent 40 minutes going over forms, and some strategy, with Wells, while her friends had the real fun. 

  
The trainer, Lincoln, was bald. That was the extent of his flaws. Literally, the man was chiseled so completely it’s possible his jawline was even toned. Everything on his body flexed with the tiniest movement, so much so even Raven, who had recently discovered her intense interest in women, stared a little too long to pass off as just a learning look. And then, of course, was Octavia, being eyed by a concerned Bellamy as she didn’t even bother hiding her attraction to Lincoln.

  
It didn’t help that while he was in those baggy, dark grey, frankly ugly, cargo pants given to everyone in the compound, his shirt was no-where to be found. Clarke could tell that to Octavia, the sweat on his chest and protruding abs might as well have been massage oil. While Anya and Indra were far stricter in their teachings, Lincoln was only serious enough to keep the group on task, otherwise he was more relaxing to be around. Subsequently, it was obvious that Lincoln saw the look he was getting, and if Clarke didn’t know any better, she might think she saw him sneak Octavia a smile or two.

  
“AAHHH Jesus, Raven! When he said use what you were taught, Lincoln meant the take down he just showed us, not your ability weird ability to apply physics or whatever to everything and try to put a right angle in my forearm,” Jasper seethed, face flushed. He was shouting but they all knew he wasn’t really upset as he was in physical pain. Needless to say, his combat training would be done for the day.

  
Raven, on the other hand, hardly looked remorseful, “Sorry Jazz, if you wanted to be handled with kid gloves, you should’ve picked Monty for one-on-ones,” she snarked back.

  
“Alright, that’s enough. Atom and Octavia, you’re up. While, Raven, your form was excellent, the intent here is to practice the skills you need safely, not to maim your peers,” Lincoln paused to make sure Raven heard him, continuing as she nodded, “Clarke, walk with Jasper to the med bay, take him to Nyko,” He finished. Finally, something to do. Clarke had been sitting, watching, for the better part of an hour at this point. Walking Jasper’s bruised body, and ego, to the infirmary was a welcome activity. 

  
“Lead the way Clarkey! I hope they’ve got the good drugs here; the last compound didn’t have anything fun.” Ever the optimist, Jasper was. “Like hell a military program is going to get you high on morphine for a bruised bone and a bloody nose. That’s a cute dream, let’s go.” She laughed. Clarke escorted Jasper out of the combat room, which was just like their sleeping quarters, only bigger, all around, and lined with weapons on every wall, with 4 different sparring matts covering the floor. It wasn’t difficult to retrace her steps to the medical room from yesterday, and as they drew closer, the signs on the wall assured her that Clarke was leading them in the right direction.

  
As they entered the room, Clarke dumped Jasper on the nearest patient’s bed, and turned to find Nyko or Wells. What she wasn’t expecting to find, however, was Lexa, sitting on a bed herself, calmly letting Wells bandage her arm, which Clarke now noticed looked severely bruised, even from across the room. She couldn’t make out much except the bruising went up and down her entire arm, like the whole thing had been encased in rubber bands for too long, except now it was a deep red, instead of black and blue.

  
It was unusual to see the Commander without her formal jacket, showing her rank. Instead she had the black over coat half off, and instead of the usual white button down high up officials had under the coats, Lexa was in a black t-shirt. It might be the most casual Clarke had seen her, which wasn’t saying much given how long she’d actually been here, and that the Commander was otherwise still in full uniform.

  
“Jasper who is it you insulted now?” Wells rounded the corner into the med bay, questioning Jazz as he did so. “Hey, it’s never been unprovoked! Maybe once, or twice. Not the point! Raven did this, she thought combat practice meant pulverize this morning.” Jasper huffed, he now had blood seeping into his mouth from his nose, although he didn’t seem at all bothered by it, if how he was licking it off of his top lip was any indication. Clarke rolled her eyes at both of them, laughing along with Wells at the scene that was Jasper.

  
“So, Clarke, are you ready to power through your first solo drift?” Wells said excitedly. As she went to respond, Clarke saw Nyko coming over to the three of them from the corner of her eye from the right. She instead addressed the senior medical officer, about to explain Jasper’s injuries when a different voice broke the light-hearted bubble, “Wells, Nyko, report to the drift simulator in 45 minutes, we need the solo set up and ready to go by 12:50. Clarke, return to your bunk room. Anya will be waiting for you there; you are to prepare to drift under her instructions.” Lexa buttoned up her jacket as she spoke, authority rolling off of her in effortless waves.

  
“ Yes, Commander.” Everyone nodded to Lexa as she left the room, Clarke moving to follow her orders.  
  
~

As expected, Anya was leaning against the door of Clarke’s shared living space, dressed in the usual attire for combat training. It was the same as Lincolns, except Anya was actually wearing her black t-shirt with the ugly grey pants. The distinguishing factor between ranks was the number of stripes on either sleeve, which were the same color as the training pants. Cadets had 1 stripe, Rangers had 2, Nightblood pilots, which were all over this compound, had 3, and Officers had 4. 

  
Officers usually were not trained to be pilots, and instead were tasked with being the engineers, technicians, and medical experts of the compound. Lexa, being the highest rank, and being the only Commander, had an entirely black uniform, with one red stripe that ran vertically down the right side of her shirt. With her formal wear, it was a red rope that looped from her right shoulder and under her right arm.

  
Clarke and her friends had one stripe, although they were close to having their second. Anya had 3. She also, as Clarke drew closer, had a very unimpressed expression on her face, still not interested in “babysitting” Clarke or her friends.

  
“Please, walk slower, I love standing around waiting for you and your incompetent friends.” Well someone was bitter, “The commander has tasked me with running you through pre-drift exercises, which usually are reserved for the nightbloods. If you last more than 5 seconds solo drifting, I’ll be shocked.” Anya was in no mood for happiness, apparently. 

  
Clarke resisted the urge to roll her eyes outright, “Thank you, for your vote of confidence. I appreciate you taking the time to help me, as much as that pains you.” She sassed. She knew she shouldn’t, Anya would only make her morning more difficult. What could she say? She’d spent too much time with Raven, who was not the best influence for manors.

  
“Take your attitude and swallow it. The Commander wants you prepared for what’s to come. I know you’re aware of how dangerous this is going to be, and I don’t want to be the reason Lexa’s new toy melts in an hour. We’re meditating, you need to learn to control your mind, that’s how we buy you more time before blacking out.” She hissed, and then turned, clearly meaning for Clarke to follow her.

  
And so Clarke did, wondering what the hell she’d gotten herself into.

~

Titus did not enjoy being demoted. Unfortunately, he’d outgrown his usefulness to Lexa, and now, he was stuck in the control center. There were worse things to happen, considering the argument he started that landed him here. And for that, he was grateful. However, Thelonious Jaha and his monologues grated on Titus’ nerves. The man loved hearing himself talk, even more than Titus himself; he had been told on numerous occasions the very same thing. “Theo, please, what has you out of sorts? I know we haven’t had any new alerts, there’s no reason to be rambling this much.” Titus had had enough for the day. It was barely past noon.

  
Theo, on the other hand, was apparently just getting started, “We haven’t received any heat warnings or alerts of activities from the Pacific, but that does not mean there is no worry to be had. Haven’t you looked at the satellite images over the last week? It’s quiet where we’ve been looking, I don’t think that means there is no danger.” Theo always sounded breathless when he spoke, another quality that aggravated Titus to no end. “Stop with the speeches and just show me what you’ve found. We’d get far more work done if you would learn to hold your tongue more often.” Now Titus had raised his voice, his impatience getting the better of him.

  
“Look at the images from Satellite R-27, we’ve got activity far North of Greenland, in what looks to be Oodaaq Island. Most of Greenland can’t be inhabited because of the glaciers, and yet we’ve got something going on in the Arctic Circle. Look at the pictures from 3 days ago to yesterday. What exactly would you say that is?” Theo inquired, knowing Titus would understand. Whatever was happening far North, it was unlike anything they’d seen since the last Kaiju had been spotted.

  
“Shit, so the Kaiju are apparently not our only problem.” Titus conceded, Theo was for once, not acting a fool. It had to be big, if the satellites could see the monstrosity sitting in Greenland to be so detailed in the images. “And in the mean time, we need all the information we can get on what that is, and who is responsible for it. That island was recorded as deserted for the last 15 years, obviously that intel was incorrect.” Theo nodded in agreement, but stopped Titus from leaving the room. They couldn’t take this to Lexa, not yet, “Titus, we need to know more before we take this to the Commander. You know she’ll want answers that we do not have. Needless panic does us no good, not when she has other responsibilities to handle right now.” Theo pleaded, hoping Titus was not so dense to ignore his reasoning. 

  
“Alright. But we can’t keep it from her for long, she’ll skin us if something happens without her knowing there was an issue at all. No more than a week, swear it!” Titus demanded. For both of their sakes, he hoped Theo knew what he was doing.

~

“Clarke, we’re almost ready to go.” Nyko announced.

  
The blue-eyed blonde was talking to Wells as she waited for Nyko to finish calibrating the sim. In order to connect the brain to the Jaeger, a small, metal plate with sensors was attached to the back of the pilot’s neck, followed by the helmet that allowed the neural pathways in the brain to start the handshake, or bridge. In Clarke’s case, she’d just be in the bridge on her own, bearing the brunt of all the stress, for as long as she could. She was not looking forward to this. “Okay, Clarke you know the drill, the plate goes first, then the helmet. The sim is ready, once you’re hooked into the machine, you’ll have 5 seconds before it starts.” Nyko was now behind her, letting the plate latch onto the top of her spine. She felt the familiar sting, it was brief, and it didn’t last as long as it used to. Once it faded, she put the helmet on.

  
“Let’s do this, Wells, fire it up.” Clarke grimaced, letting the controls of the sim hook into the helmet, and stabilizing her low back. It was more or less like a fancy seat belt, just one the clicked into her suit in the back, and wrapped around her waist. “Commander, may we proceed?” Nkyo stopped Wells before he could start without permission. This was authorized under Lexa’s orders; it wasn’t allowed to start without her word. “Begin.” 

  
Clarke locked eyes with Lexa as the countdown started. Hopefully she could last long enough to wipe the scowl off of her face, then maybe this experiment would be worth it. Why that was what she chose to think about at this moment was beyond her, but her thoughts immediately changed, the drift starting. 

  
It started out in the same way her past attempts had, she felt as is her senses were enhanced, while at the same time her nerves burned down to her toes. Memories from her life flashed around her like broken movie clips, seconds appearing at a time, then stopping, replaced by another. She let them flow, sticking to one would cause the handshake to fail. There was always one particular memory that was hard to let pass, there was always a part of her that felt she had to see it. Every time she had to force her focus on the task at hand. Said task had now taken a turn, and it wasn’t good.

  
All of sudden Clarke felt an immense amount of pressure coming from numerous parts of her head. The bottom head where the metal plate lay throbbed, and burned. Everything was warmer, now, too. Actually, warm would insinuate that there was some comfort, there was no comfort in this feeling. Clarke felt like the back of neck was being torched, and the longer she stayed awake, the farther the feeling spread. It was inching its way down her back and over her collarbones. The weight crushing her skull was increasing by the second, Clarke had no idea how much time had passed. She knew where she was, she could still see her surroundings. But everything was glossed over, like Clarke was on the inside of a fish tank. 

  
That was when she felt liquid on her face. When did the sims have water? The rims of her eyes started to swell, her vision blackening, while going red at the edges. Clarke went to speak, not that she had a coherent thing to say at the moment. It didn’t matter, but the time she managed to open her mouth, she could already feel her consciousness slipping away, barely seeing the forms that had somehow gotten closer in the last second. With that, she was out.

~

Everything was going well, and for 3 and half minutes, Lexa thought Clarke might actually be able to pilot on her own. They’d only had 2 people in Jaeger history that had been able to solo drift longer than this, and that only happened because they were in the middle of a battle, a fight or flight situation that forced them to accomplish the impossible.

  
34 seconds into the third minute was the first sign of a problem. Clarke had seemed receptive and engaged with the drift, but now the systems showed spikes in her blood pressure and heart rate, signaling the stress getting the better of her. Lexa let this go on for an additional 10 seconds, before giving the order to shut it down. She wanted Clarke to have the time to recover, however once the pressure of the system overtakes the drift, it was unlikely Clarke would regain control. Now, it was dangerous for her to be connected to the sim.

  
“Nyko! Shut it down, that’s enough.” Lexa was snarling, she could see the blood pooling from Clarke’s nose, it was already starting to leak from her eyes too. This was not good, obviously. She can’t have the first test run kill the most prominent recruit they’ve seen in years. This is what Lexa told herself as she moved to help Wells detach the blonde from the machine. It was strange, how alarmed she was for this girl she hardly knew. It was something to fret over later, Clarke was unconscious in a pool of her own blood, she needed medical attention immediately.

  
They all knew the risks, the shock of how long Clarke had lasted momentarily stunned the room, causing the slow reactions of everyone before stopping and getting to Clarke. Luckily, a gurney had been brought in earlier to be prepared for this exact situation, and suddenly Lexa snapped back in motion.

  
“Wells, you and I will get Clarke on the gurney, Nyko, run ahead to the med bay, call for any assistance you think you’ll need. Anya! Take word to the Sky bunk, and call Lincoln. Train them in combat with the nightbloods, make them focus under stress. Move!” She boomed. Lexa hadn’t meant to let the test get this serious, and yet here they were.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do we think of Theo and Titus? I personally think it's fitting they're stuck with each other.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the feedback! There will be more Jaha and Titus bickering to come. 
> 
> Let me know what you think of this one!
> 
> Cheers

Not a chance in hell. No way was Raven going to allow that, no matter what little to no, none really, authority she held. This was ludicrous! She was not going to walk through 8 feet of scorching coal. Pilot badass creds be damned, Raven valued the nerves in her toes. She also wasn’t particularly excited to smell her own flesh melting, or burning. Torching herself was not in the cards for Raven Reyes.

  
Raven Reyes did not get her way. Anya, she’s decided, again, was a real peachy bitch. What the Fuck was this, anyway? She’s sure there were other, better, safer, ways of mental training and meditation than dealing with copious amounts of sharp and searing pain on her heals.

  
God she’d take a little oxygen deprivation from the Council of fucks over this, and that was saying something. Raven was going to say as much, when Monty spoke out first, “What the hell!? No, why is this the way to ‘focus ourselves under duress’ to prepare for battle? We could lose toes for this!” He started in a shout, and fizzled out into more of sad squeak. Poor Monty.

  
Raven would’ve expected Anya to be annoyed with them, as she was every time any of them spoke out of turn, but she could’ve sworn the pilot was smirking this time. “For once, watching you complete a task I’ve laid out might actually be entertaining. Yes, you could lose your toes, so I suggest walking fast, and staying calm, as I’ve told you to do. Combat brings immense pain when piloting Jaegers. Surely, this should mimic the necessary stimulus for all you to work on your tolerance of the pain, and your mental control,” for once Anya wasn’t sneering at them, “Every pilot in this compound has gone through either this test, or others like it, some worse. If you’d like, I would be happy to turn you into a lightning rod instead, Monty Green.” And there was that familiar flat, cold tone Anya saved just for them.

  
Monty had no response to that other than quick shake of the head “no,” which cued Anya to turn on the heat. Anya had been with the gang for combat training this morning, excluding Clarke. She had been out of commission for two days after her solo pilot, and in the three days since, she’d been corralled into tests and studies led by the medical team in the compound. That, and the Commander had always been in range of the blonde, and it was unnerving for Raven and her friends to see Clarke with her hanging around.

  
In any case, Clarke actually got lucky, because she, for one, did not have to be man-handled by Anya, as the six of them had, nor would she have to walk across the hot stones. At least, not today. And Raven was very jealous of that. It made sense, in an annoying way, to use this test for mental training. Focusing on a task while being in immense pain, or under high amounts of stress, was ultimately the best way for all of them to be prepared to fight, without actually being in one. Still, Raven didn’t have to enjoy it, and she sure as hell would not be thanking Anya for it, regardless of what benefits came out of this.

  
Bellamy was lined up first, followed by his pair, Atom. Raven and Octavia would follow, and Jasper and Monty would be last. The first steps Bellamy took could be heard, more than seen. And not because of the strangled hissing sound he was making. If skin could crackle, Raven could’ve sworn that’s what his was doing. It was absolutely disgusting, and not at all helping Raven psych herself up to experience that. From the expressions around her, she wasn’t the only one feeling that way.

  
If she weren’t concerned for herself, it would actually be comical, watching Bellamy waddle across the stones, arms flapping like a disgruntled pigeon that missed out on garbage scraps. From her peripheral vision, she could tell Anya, who stood on their left, would agree, from the looks of the overly satisfied gleam in her eyes.

  
“Oh god, Fucking hell,” Bellamy was panting as he stepped off the coals, still gingerly hopping from one foot to the other, sweat visible on his face, “Is there ice for this? Shit that hurt. Short walk, painful coals!” Overall, he sounded fine, besides the obvious discomfort coming from his feet.

  
Anya showed some mercy on them when she moved to drag a large bin of ice into the room, a safe distance away from the heated path. At least they had that to look forward to, Raven thought. She was hoping there’d be more of that kindness left in store for them today, though she didn’t count on it. After all, Anya was still a bitch, albeit an attractive one.

~

The med bay was apparently much bigger than Clarke had initially seen. Three days ago, she woke in the recovery room, which was equal in size to the main section. It was surprising, to say the least, to wake up somewhere she’d never been. Not that that had never happened, Clarke did wake up in a dropship hurtling towards Earth with a vague recollection of events that got her there. 

  
She’d been out cold for two days after her first solo. She would’ve thought it might be her last solo, but after being testing for hours after waking, Wells informed her that the Commander was encouraged by her drift, and they’d be making it a regular occurrence. Clarke hoped losing consciousness and sleeping for days would not be a part of the schedule.

  
Nyko explained that they’d run tests while she was out, first and foremost checking for any structural damage, and further monitoring her brain activity for any abnormalities. They didn’t find any, which was a relief for everyone involved. He also said she’d likely been out for so long because of the stress the drift put on her body. They called it a handshake for a reason, and people aren’t usually going around shaking their own hands. 

  
Clarke had a greater understanding of just how taxing drifting was, given her solo, which lasted over 3 and half minutes, had put her on her ass for the next 48 hours. She didn’t remember much after blacking out; however, she did remember the heavy weight and pressure she felt. It was painful, and strenuous, but there was also this strong aura of power hanging around her. She could move her own arms and legs, and that command extended through her to a giant machine as tall as buildings. It was incredible, while it lasted. 

  
An unfortunate side effect of the solo drift was that Clarke would be at an increased risk of nose bleeds for the foreseeable future. Nyko wasn’t sure if it was permanent, just that, all things considered, she was lucky that was the only issue. 

  
Today, Clarke was meeting with Lexa and Nyko, and she’s sure Wells would also be present. Clarke had heard from Wells some of what Lexa had planned, but largely she wasn’t sure what to expect. This was going to be part of training for a while, although she knew drifting solo too often was dangerous. She was curious to see if the Commander would acknowledge that, or if Clarke was disposable enough to be worked into the ground regardless of safety.

  
On her way to the med bay, she ran into Wells, who looked to be heading in the same direction. When he saw her, he smiled; the two of them had developed a steady friendship over the last few months, him having trained her. His outward happiness was contagious, and Clarke found herself smiling back, about to greet him. Unfortunately, he was not the only one headed for the med bay at the same moment as Clarke, it seemed. Lexa appeared around the corner of the hall that Wells had just left, easily startling the two as there’d been no sound or warning she was even in the vicinity. 

  
Clarke hadn’t actually spoken much to Lexa since she awoke, although she’d seen her frequently, seemingly always there. “Commander,” Clarke nodded her head acknowledging her presence, Wells imitating the movement.

  
“Clarke, Wells, your punctuality is appreciated.” Walking past the pair, Lexa made eye contact with both of them as she spoke. The commander was certainly not one to waste her breath on pleasantries. 

  
Wells just shrugged at Clarke, as if it’s nothing out of the ordinary. Together they followed the Commander in a comfortable silence. Neither bothered with speculation about the meeting and the plans going forward, they had a general sense of what the future would hold, which was enough not to be worried.

  
Walking into the med bay, Lexa had already found Nyko, and the two superiors motioned for Clarke and Wells to follow them into an office on the right wall of the room. The room wasn’t as big as the usual conference rooms used for debriefs and other meetings. Being in the medical room, there was no need for it; instead there was a small round table in the middle of the room, just big enough to sit four people, maybe five if you tried. Nyko closed the door before taking his seat, and set up his laptop so everyone at the table could see the display.

  
“Commander, Wells, Clarke has already cleared the use of her medical records for this meeting, which we’ve already discussed a few times, however I’ll explain the latest tests, and whatever your suggestions,” he eyed Lexa as he spoke, “Wells and I can offer advice on the best way to proceed safely.” Nyko was all business, opening different files, the newest test results, and going through his examination of Clarke’s ability to drift.

  
Wells caught Clarke’s eye, giving her a small smile, continuing to calm her nerves as Lexa stared holes through the screen during Nyko’s rambling. From what Clarke understood, she would be able to continue her solo practice for now, the uncertainty was for how long she could do so before any permanent damage might show up. Nyko wasn’t entirely sure what kind of rest she would need between sims, and he wary about whether or not Clarke would be able to drift longer even with practice. Meaning, Clarke could solo drift for weeks, and might still only be able to so for 3 or so minutes before burning out. 

  
She’s not sure what would happen if that were the case.

  
Clarke found herself tuning out Nyko, instead gazing at the Commander, whose eyes looked closer to a forest green in the lighting, instead of the lighter shade Clarke remembered seeing after her sim. Even so, they sparkled all the same, giving away more than Lexa may be aware. Her pupils were shifting slightly, taking in the information from the screen, clearly processing what she saw and heard, deeply focused on the task at hand, being Clarke’s health and training. It was fascinating to watch the Commander as she worked through everything, composed and calm. The way she held herself let everyone around her know who had the power, but it wasn’t menacing. 

  
Lexa glanced her way, catching her eyes which made Clarke pray she wasn’t outwardly showing her embarrassment for staring at the Commander for too long. Glancing back at Nyko, she spoke, “The plan for now is to have Clarke drift solo every three days to start. You will monitor her health daily, and through her training. Nyko will push the sim 10 seconds every session, unless it puts Clarke in danger. I will not risk Clarke’s health purely for information. If her brain starts to deteriorate in any ways, the first sign of issues is to be brought to me immediately.” Lexa glanced around the table, waiting for anyone to add or pose a question to what she said.

  
Clarke was pleasantly surprised by the Commander’s concern for her wellbeing concerning her drift sessions. She couldn’t put her finger on how that made her feel, she just knew when it came to Lexa, she probably shouldn’t be thinking and feeling about her the way that Clarke might be. She found herself hoping she’d have the chance to talk to her, about what, Clarke didn’t know. Anything, nothing, she wanted to be allowed to lose herself in those green eyes, which both excited and frightened her at the same time.  
“Okay then. Clarke, you will start your drift solos tomorrow, every third day, joining your sky group the days between your drift. Nyko, you and I will meet weekly to update me on her progress, and Wells, you are to return to training with Clarke for the foreseeable future. Questions?” There were none. “Good,” The Commander stood, nodding, and exited the room, concluding the meeting.

~

“Indra, where’s Anya? She’s supposed to be joining us to discuss the progress of the sky crew.” Lexa checked the time again, Anya was never late, not without prior warning. She wanted both her Pilots here to discuss getting the six sky Rangers into actual Jaegers. 

  
“My apologies, Commander, but Anya is still with Lincoln for their combat training with the other pilots.” Indra looked surprised; it was not often that Anya forgot to include Lexa in her plan changes. Or never, really. “Well then, I’ll debrief with her later. What updates do you have regarding Titus and Thelonious? They’ve been skittish about something for the past 8 days.” Lexa was no fool. The last time she went to check in on the two, they assured her that they were looking into new images, but there was no need for immediate concern. She also knew that they were leaving out details, she was trained to sense when someone was lying. 

  
But instead of push, she’s allowed them to look into it on their own, knowing when they had enough information to confirm a threat, they’d bring it to her. Because she was Commander, however, Lexa kept her trusted circle small, and had asked Indra to keep an eye on them to be sure Lexa’s instincts weren’t betraying her. 

  
Indra gave a smirk as she answered, “They’re searching for something, they don’t want to bring you information about a threat that may not be real. Titus does not want to be responsible for giving you incomplete, or incorrect information. You were right, they’ll come to you when they figure it out.” 

  
Lexa exhaled, feeling more at ease with that situation. She nodded at Indra, and waved her off to her duties. 

  
It had been ten days since the plan for Clarke’s training had been laid out. From Nyko’s reports, Clarke was in no immediate danger while drifting, however it was becoming apparent that she wasn’t able to drift alone for more than 3 or so minutes, not without coming too close to blacking out again. It worried Lexa, for multiple reasons, the most pressing being Clarke’s health. Which, was a problem in it of itself, because that concern extended beyond what’s appropriate for someone in Lexa’s position. 

  
It was borderline infuriating how gorgeous her blonde hair and sky-blue eyes were. It made Lexa’s job difficult, she couldn’t afford distractions. She’d been down this road before, and she’d paid a high price for not being more careful with her heart. Lexa couldn’t make that mistake again.

  
On top of that, Lexa knew the next logical step would be to pair Clarke with a nightblood. They had never drifted a pilot with the nightblood and one without it, but Clarke’s neuro capacity was beyond anything the program had ever seen. The problem with that solution was every nightblood pilot at the compound was paired. They wouldn’t be here if they weren’t, Lexa was the exception. She was the exception, her pair had been killed, and instead of retirement, or a training position, Lexa instead ascended to take charge of the entire program.

  
Now, here she was, afraid of what she knew she had to do. She was the only nightblood without a pair, and was the only one available to test with Clarke. It was an uncomfortable feeling for her, knowing she was going to have to drift again, for the first time in years, and it wouldn’t be with Costia. Her last memories of being a Jaeger pilot were horrific, and she had spent the last three years hoping to wake up without that agony. She’d give anything, not to have intimate knowledge of Costia’s pain when she died, along with the visions of watching her fly through the air like a paper ball.

  
After talking over the results with Nyko, they’d decided on testing Clarke alone twice more, giving her a chance to progress a little more. Clarke herself was stubborn in the tests, continuously asking Nyko to let her drift longer, even when she shouldn’t. This would give her the chance she wanted. It would also allow Lexa the time to prepare herself for what she’d have to do.

  
Lexa had been roaming the corridors with her thoughts as she’s always done. Not aimless, she was always aware, in her position it would be reckless not to be. She was, however, not expecting to run into anyone roaming the same sector as her. This part of the compound had been empty for the last year, it was turned into storage because it was getting too old.

  
Blonde hair caught her eye, and suddenly bright, glowing blue eyes were in front of her. For a second she didn’t move; looking into the blue was like gazing up at the sky day dreaming. Clearly Clarke was not expecting to see her either, she jumped back, startled out of her trance. “Ah, Commander! Hi, I didn’t realize anyone else was over here,” Clarke recovered well, although Lexa could easily tell she had scared the blonde.

  
“Hello Clarke, what brings you here?” Lexa offered a small smile, hoping she didn’t sound too cold. In truth, she was nervous having run into Clarke unexpectedly. It was a new feeling for her, and it took some control to keep it off of her face.

  
Blue eyes glanced around the hall, mouth opening twice before she answered, “Wells wouldn’t let me train with my bunk, and Nyko agreed that I needed rest, but I didn’t want to sit around waiting so I started walking… which I’m not actually sure where we are, I wasn’t paying attention,” Clarke looked around and back at Lexa as she spoke, color blooming in her cheeks as she realized she’d been rambling.

  
Lexa actually found it endearing, though it’s not something she could show. In fact, Clarke shouldn’t so careless with her surroundings as she said she was. “You need strength for your training, Nyko and Wells know this. Resting does not mean being unaware, Clarke. You cannot leave yourself vulnerable to surprises such that you don’t know where you are. Come, I’ll lead you back.” Lexa gave her a pointed look, admitting to herself that her unease at Clarke’s behavior was more personal than just giving her subordinate a lesson. She couldn’t afford to leave herself open to attack or otherwise.

  
“I’m well aware of the dangers on Earth, if you haven’t noticed the fact that my friends and I have been training for you for months.” Clarke’s lightheartedness from before faded and aggravation clearly replaced it. Her eyes turned a darker shade of blue as she shot the Commander a heated glare. 

  
Lexa hardly had anyone beside Anya, and annoyingly Titus, speak to her that way after she became Commander. Where she’d started to guide them back, she stopped and turned to face Clarke head on. “I’ll allow your disrespect here, as we are alone. If others were around that would not be the case. Do that again, and I won’t show this leniency.” She knew she was harsh. She intended to be; Clarke couldn’t lose her composure like this. Lexa did not want to be commanding with her, but she needed the message to be heard.

  
For a second it looked like Clarke would bite out another harsh response, and then it was as if a realization dawned on her, and she nodded. Lexa started to walk again, not turning to see if Clarke was following. She smiled despite herself when she her the blonde’s footsteps coming to her side. They walked in silence for some time, not uncomfortably. Then Clarke glanced at Lexa, and turned to step in Lexa’s path, stopping both of them.

  
Just as Lexa started to ask what she was doing, Clarke spoke, “Why am I not being punished?” it was a question, but the way Clarke looked at her could’ve fooled anyone that it was a command, too. 

  
“You’ve been warned not to do it again.” Lexa couldn’t give Clarke the truth. She couldn’t say she was sparing her because she wanted to. “I understand, but something tells me you don’t hand out warnings. You’ve been watching my sims but haven’t talked to me since the first one. You’re ignoring me but now you’re nice, why?” So, Lexa had underestimated how perceptive this sky girl was. For once, she enjoyed being wrong, Clarke was intuitive, a great quality for piloting. And for human beings.

  
Lexa sighed, “Clarke. Your time solo drifting was never a permanent solution. I know Nyko has told you you only have two more. You need to drift with another pilot, and it needs to be a nightblood. Every pilot here with nightblood has a pair. Except for me. I’ve been at your sims to know how to help you because I will be drifting with you.” Lexa chose to ignore the matter of disrespect from earlier. Clarke looked like she’d bit a ghost pepper by mistake and couldn’t handle the heat.

  
“We have to drift?” She didn’t sound fearless like she was just minutes ago, Clarke sounded nervous. “Will that even work? None of my drifts had worked before…” she wondered aloud.

  
“Your previous attempts were with pilots who hadn’t been given the nightblood. With what we know now about you and your group, Nyko and I believe the connection will work with me because I do have nightblood.”

  
“And what if it works? How does that help me, I can’t pilot a Jaeger with you, you’re the Commander!” Clarke was panicked, Lexa could hear it, and could see her breathing speeding up. Tentatively, Lexa reached for her hand, cupping it with both of hers, letting Clarke feel her pulse in her wrist. “Clarke, look at me, focus on me. Focus on my hands, try to match your heartbeat to mine.” Lexa was calm as she spoke, having dealt with panic attacks of her own, on her own. She could feel Clarke trembling, but saw her trying to control her breath.

  
After a few moments, minutes maybe, Clarke looked at her. She didn’t pull her hand away. Instead, Clarke brought her other hand to rest on top of Lexa’s. They both looked down at the mess of hands, and Lexa could’ve sworn she felt Clarke massage a tiny circle on her wrist with her thumb. It was soothing, and the moment between them was charged with something Lexa couldn’t name. 

  
Clarke slowly pulled her hands back, and looked up, “Thank you, Commander.”

  
“Lexa”

  
“What?”

  
“We’ll be drifting soon. Alone, you may call me Lexa.” Lexa spoke softly, as not to bring them out of the little bubble that formed out of no where.

  
Clarke gave her a small smile, “Thank you, Lexa.” 

  
Lexa returned her smile with one of her own, “Come, I’ll bring you back to Nyko. Perhaps we should discuss some things before we drift.” Instead of walking off, Lexa gestured with her arm for Clarke to walk with her. She knew it was true, they needed to talk. And she wanted to, although now she wonders if she should’ve waited to ask for it. Whatever that moment was, it aided in Lexa’s lapse in judgement, and now she was walking with the women whose eyes seemed to peer in at her soul, on their way to talk about being inside each other’s heads. Excellent. 


End file.
